Remembering Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri on Her 70th Birthday – Story 27 : “Please look after Ayya Seri”

Posted on November 18, 2022 by Ayya Seri Bhikkhuni

STORY 27 – “PLEASE LOOK AFTER AYYA SERI”

by Ayya Seri Bhikkhuni

On 15th October 2021, Ajahn Brahm visited Patacara Bhikkhuni Hermitage in Jane Brook. He came to see Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri who was admitted into Palliative Care at Home.

At that time, Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri asked not to be taken to the hospital anymore. Before Ajahn Brahm left, he asked her whether there was anything she would like to say to him or ask him.

I took out the spelling chart that was filled with the alphabets from A to Z and let Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri spell out her sentence. Since she was no longer able to speak, she squeezed my hand if she wanted to spell out a letter.

After some hard work, her sentence was: “Please look after A”. Ajahn Brahm guessed Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri wanted to say to him: “Please look after Ayya Seri.” She squeezed my hand.

I burst into tears. Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri was very weak and fragile at this time. She could have asked for a blessing or any other questions, but she was concerned about my well-being. I was very touched by her lovingkindness, compassion and care. She passed away five weeks later on 20th November 2021.

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Remembering Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri on Her 70th Birthday – Story 26 : Pavarana ceremony at ED

Posted on November 17, 2022 by Ayya Seri Bhikkhuni

STORY 26 – PAVARANA CEREMONY AT ED

by Ayya Seri Bhikkhuni

Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri was determined and zealous in carrying out her responsibilities and duties as a bhikkhuni.

She was admitted to Palliative Care at Home in June 2021. Even though she was gravely ill, she would always participate in the Uposatha ceremony. The last Uposatha day we had together at Patacara Bhikkhuni Hermitage was on 4th November 2021. She passed away on 20th November that year.

I remember the early morning of 13th October 2019, the Pavarana day – the official end of the rains retreat ceremony for monastics, I had to call an ambulance to take Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri to the emergency department of the hospital.

I tried with difficulty to contact Bodhinyana Monastery in the early hours of the morning from the hospital to inform Ajahn Brahm that I might not be able to go the monastery for the Pavarana ceremony with the bhikkhu sangha. Fortunately, Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri’s condition stabilized very quickly.

We knew life could be very unpredictable and changeable.

Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri and I carried out the bhikkhuni’s Pavarana ceremony in the critical care area of the emergency department of the hospital. She was discharged a few hours later that day. She was stable enough for me to leave her in the capable hands of the support workers and so I travelled to Bodhinyana Monastery late afternoon for the Pavarana ceremony with the bhikkhu sangha. I was very concerned about her condition, but she urged me to go, and she said she would be alright and gave me a radiant smile. I paid respect to her before I left.

I have great respect and was inspired by Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri’s unwavering resolve and faith in the Buddha, Dhamma and Sangha.

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Remembering Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri on Her 70th Birthday : Story 25 : The radiant smile

Posted on November 16, 2022 by Ayya Seri Bhikkhuni

STORY 25 – THE RADIANT SMILE

by Ayya Seri Bhikkhuni

Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni on her 60th birthday celebration at Patacara Bhikkhuni Hermitage. Photo by Zor.

All the lay supporters, volunteers, health professionals and support workers loved to come to Patacara Bhikkhuni Hermitage and loved to see Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri – her beautiful smile, radiating lovingkindness and peace.

Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri could not speak much towards the last year of her life. But we were drawn to her beautiful smile, her aura of gentleness and peace. We were also comforted by her ease and compassion.

She remembered the names of the children and grandchildren of the support workers and volunteers and was always interested in what happened in their lives. She made every one of us feel special and important.

We always remember her beautiful, gentle and radiant smile.

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Remembering Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri on Her 70th Birthday – Story 24 : Gratitude

Posted on November 15, 2022 by Ayya Seri Bhikkhuni

STORY 24 – GRATITUDE

by Ayya Seri Bhikkhuni

Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri remembered all the positive, kind and generous actions and incidents of people. She also treasured the generous offerings that she received.

She remembered the name of the donors who offered the shrine table at the monastery. She remembered the young woman who offered the shrine table for Patacara Bhikkhuni Hermitage with her first pay from work. She also remembered the people who offered the vases for the shrine and the people who knitted the beanies and woolen warm clothing for her. She even told me the person who offered her the lifetime membership of Buddhist Publication Society in memory of their father.

She still stayed in contact with Dayaseeli, the woman who only speaks Sinhala and who went to the Parappuduwa Nuns’ Island to cook for the nuns. Every year, Dayaseeli used to send us beautiful big Vesak cards from Sri Lanka. Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri would take time to get someone to write a letter back to Dayaseeli in Sinhala. She also continued to stay in contact with her childhood neighbour, Margery (in her late 80’s).

Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri was always very grateful for the help and support that she received. It was very difficult for me to inform Dayaseeli and Margery about her death.

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Remembering Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri on Her 70th Birthday – Story 23 : Bhava

Posted on November 14, 2022 by Ayya Seri Bhikkhuni

STORY 23 – BHAVA

by Ayya Seri Bhikkhuni

I loved to go for walks in the bush at the monastery with Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri. It was a great opportunity to learn about the environment that I lived in and be more at ease with the beings I shared the space with. In addition, my teacher occasionally would offer some teaching during the walk.

When we were walking through the bush this time, Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri pointed to a dead tree log on the ground in the bush. She asked me what I could see. I said: “A dead tree log.” She said: “Look carefully again, what else can you see?” This time I noticed a small branch with green leaves was growing out from the dead tree log. It was unusual. Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri asked again: “What does the growing branch remind you of?” I said: “I don’t know.” She said: “Bhava.” She continued: “Beings strive to survive and continue ‘life’ in every given circumstances. Even in the dead tree log.”

I could not remember the rest of the teaching from her. But I saw a small branch growing out from a dead tree log during my walk a few days ago in Jhana Grove. I remembered Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri’s teaching to me.

Our desire for life after life is so ingrained in us. The practice of Dhamma is going against the grain, like the poem of Arahat Patacara Bhikkhuni: “Then having taken a needle, I pulled down the wick. The liberation of the mind was like the quenching of the lamp”. Until one day the fire extinguished.

The tree branch in Jhana Grove Meditation Retreat Centre May 2022

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Remembering Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri on Her 70th Birthday – Story 22 : The fly in the spider web

Posted on November 13, 2022 by Ayya Seri Bhikkhuni

STORY 22 – THE FLY IN THE SPIDER WEB

by Ayya Seri Bhikkhuni

Have you ever heard a fly caught in a spider web?

I heard the buzzing sound for the first time when I was working with Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri in a room in the nuns’ cottage at the monastery. We turned around and searched for the source of the buzzing sound. We saw a fly caught in a spider’s web and it was making its last scream for help.

Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri climbed onto a chair, apologized to the spider for taking its food away, and took the fly out of the web. She then carefully and gently unwrapped the web from the fly. When she finally removed the last bit of the web from the fly, the fly stretched its wings and flew away. I felt relief and joy watching the fly flying towards its freedom.

I heard the buzzing sound again a few months ago in my room at Jhana Grove Meditation Retreat Centre. The desperate sound of crying for help.

I remembered Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri, and so I climbed onto my chair and took the fly out of the web. I said sorry to the angry spider staring at me. I told the fly I was not as gentle and skillful as my teacher, but that I would help.

In addition, I have poor eyesight at night even with my glasses on. But I tried my best to unwrap the web from the fly. I then took the fly to the front of the cottage and opened the door. I had tears in my eyes as I watched it fly away in freedom.

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Remembering Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri on Her 70th Birthday – Story 21 : Thank you

Posted on November 12, 2022 by Ayya Seri Bhikkhuni

STORY 21 – THANK YOU

by Ayya Seri Bhikkhuni

When Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri could still speak, she always said “thank you” to me every night before she went to bed. I told her I knew in my heart that she appreciated all the things that I did for her. She did not need to say “thank you” to me every night.

Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri said she wanted to say “thank you” to me whenever she could because she might not wake up tomorrow to say “thank you” again.

I would like to put my hands together in anjali and say “thank you” to my teacher, Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri.

Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni and Ayya Seri Bhikkhuni during Forgiveness Ceremony on Pavarana Day, 19th October 2013.

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Remembering Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri on Her 70th Birthday – Story 20 : “You look very nice”

Posted on November 11, 2022 by Ayya Seri Bhikkhuni

STORY 20 – “YOU LOOK VERY NICE”

by Ayya Seri Bhikkhuni

Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri was very observant. She would notice and be aware of small changes or details of the surrounding environment and people.

She noticed new hairstyles that the volunteers or the support workers had. She was also aware of a new shirt or dress that they wore. Sometimes the volunteer came at 11.30pm to help me to offer Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri’s personal care. Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri always made sure she stayed awake so that she could talk and acknowledge their help and even told them: “You look very nice with the new hairstyle (or new shirt)!” She also always said “Thank you” to them before they left.

Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri was always full of gratitude and appreciation for all the people who helped her.

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Remembering Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri on Her 70th Birthday – Story 19 : The insects in the blue water lily pod

Posted on November 10, 2022 by Ayya Seri Bhikkhuni

STORY 19 – THE INSECTS IN THE BLUE WATER LILY POD

by Ayya Seri Bhikkhuni

I remembered Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri’s compassion, care and kindness to all beings, even the very small beings around her.

In the monastery I saw her pick up a fallen leave from the bush and try to rescue a drowning bee in the blue water lily pod. She carefully lifted the struggling bee to the rim of the pod and left it there to dry out its wings. 

Later, when we were at Patacara Bhikkhuni Hermitage in Jane Brook, she would do the same. Whenever I pushed Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri in her wheelchair and passed the puss’s water container outside the sliding door, she would stop to check whether any insects had gotten into trouble in the water. If she noticed any insects struggling in the water, she would ask me to pick up a leave or a twig on the ground and help them out of the water.

I was amazed and appreciated Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri’s care to the beings around her. I was also grateful for the opportunity to offer life and safety to the beings.

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Remembering Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri on Her 70th Birthday – Story 18 : Grandma

Posted on November 9, 2022 by Ayya Seri Bhikkhuni

STORY 18 – GRANDMA

by Ayya Seri Bhikkhuni

Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri had offered a lot of valuable advice and coaching to me regarding how to interact with Grandma gently and how to prepare my 98-year-old Grandma for her impending death.

Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri also gave me instructions to pay full attention to Grandma whenever I spoke to her and patiently listen to her complaints and stories. It was a good opportunity for me to practice the Dhamma.

When Grandma was admitted to the hospital at the emergency department in June 2014, Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri was very kind to Grandma. She went with me to see Grandma at 1.00am just before her surgery. When the surgeon tried to introduce himself and shake hands with me, I told him I would not shake hands with a man. The surgeon was apologetic and kind.

Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri laughed at me later and said that I could be a bit gentler with the surgeon who had woken up in the middle of the night to perform the surgery.

I had a loving relationship with my Grandma. She had great trust in me and was proud of my decision to let go of my career in pharmacy and naturopathy and ordain as a nun. It was hard to watch Grandma fading away in front of my eyes.

I chanted ‘Namo Tassa Bhagavato Arahato Samma-Sambuddhassa’ continuously for Grandma and she was calm and at peace whenever I was chanting. I was also wondering what else I could do for Grandma at that time. Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni Theri told me that I could just sit quietly next to Grandma offering a piece of my peace, goodness and lovingkindness.

Grandma passed away in the hospital with me sitting next to her.

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Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni and Ayya Seri Bhikkhuni tying the Paritta string at the End of Rains Cloth Offering Ceremony.
Ayya Vayama Bhikkhuni, Ayya Seri Bhikkhuni and Grandma at the End of Rains Robe Offering Ceremony on 26th October 2013.
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